Tuesday, January 31, 2006

Name three things

So Friday night when we assembled ourselves into the meeting room we were told to pick out one piece of candy from this dish, but not eat it. Later we were to meet up with the one or two other people that chose the same candy. Once in our little groups we had to find three things we had in common. Not hard for me and the lady that chose the Kisses. I use to work for her before she closed her shop. We went around the room telling everyone the three things we had in common. Soon we got to this pair of older ladies. Their list was 1.) they were both widows 2.) they were both great grandmas 3.) (the first one said to the other) I don't remember the last one do you? (the second on) no, you were suppose to remember

So we asked them if the third thing was short term memory loss. No, no, they said that wasn't it they insisted. We were laughing hysterically! We finally decided to skip them and when they thought of it we would come back to them.

About thirty minutes later one of the ladies shouted out, "Oh yeah, I remember!" We were all laughing remembering our short term memory joke when she said, "we're both dating younger men!" Needless to say it was several minutes before order returned to our room.

Monday, January 30, 2006

What a great weekend!

Oh my! I had a blast this weekend. We were at the beautiful Sequoyah State Park in
Wagoner, Oklahoma.

Here's a picture of the bunkhouse we stayed in. It was this large building. At one end was a meeting room with a fire place and kitchen. The rest of it was divided up into about 8-10 rooms. The room we stayed in had one full size bed and two sets of bunk beds. My sister-in-law and I took the bunk beds but we got to sleep on the bottom bunk.

Friday night I woke to a sound outside my window.... What was that sound?

Oh yeah, that's what rain sounds like! It's been MONTHS since it actually rained in western Oklahoma so I had almost forgotten the sound of rain. After I realized it was rain I was back asleep in about 5 seconds. The next day my sis-in-law and I played in the rain.

We were later asked if it rained where we were from. We both answered NO!

This picture came out with a cold dark gloomy feel, but it wasn't bad at all! It was a wonderful, much much needed rain. It wasn't very cold either. Perfect for a walk in the rain.

Over looking the lake.

I'll write more about the events of the weekend as time becomes available. But right now I must tend to the house my husband and daughter occupied this weekend while I was gone. You women out there will understand. Mabye some guys too.

Peace and love my friends!

Thursday, January 26, 2006

Time off

I'm officially on vacation! I'm going to my momma's. Without my husband. Without my child. Just picking up my sis-in-law on the way. Catch back up with ya'll Monday!

Wednesday, January 25, 2006

And now for something completely different

My friend Anna sent me the funniest (ok you English teacher's it's a word if I use it as a word) emails. With her permission I'm sharing it with you. This poor girl really needs a good man!

Okay, so, listen to this………………I finally got the nerve to write a little note to my neighbor that lives across the hall from me. I used a flyer thing Christina gave to me that was an invitation to her church Saturday night. I stuck it on his door and it basically said something about how it was nice to see that he was back in town (he’d been gone 2 months for the Air Force) and if he wanted to make a new friend he could just “knock”. Right, so, I left the note on his door not thinking he’d ever read it or respond to it. Guess what!! At 9:00 last night HE KNOCKED!!! I freaked! I froze up and just sat on my couch, heart pounding, mind reeling! Then he rang the door bell. Now, I couldn’t exactly just get up and answer the door after he rang the bell because there wasn’t a good excuse for not answering the door when he knocked…its not like I could say, “oh, sorry, I didn’t hear you knock” or “oh, sorry, I couldn’t make it to the door clear from the other side of my small, one bedroom apartment that takes 20 steps to walk from one side to the other.” So, I just sat on my couch, TV BLARING (so he knew I was there), car parked next to his (so he knew I was there), heart pounding, mind reeling. Then I heard his door shut. Whew!

So I run into my bathroom, fix my hair and makeup, brush my teeth, put on a cute shirt, and my shoes. I get to my door and stand there. I start praying, God, please help me get the nerves to just knock on his door and say, “hi, I heard you knock. My name is Anna.” But I continue standing in front of my door, staring at it. I finally get the nerve to unlock my door. Hey, baby steps. Then, I hear a vacuum…his. No!! Now he’ll never hear me knock. My phone rings…my mom. So I run into my bedroom and answer it, laughing. I tell her what is going on and she is hysterical. She can’t believe I’m such a dork…we laugh hard. I hear his vacuum shut off so I tell my mom I have to “go do this thing.” Right, so I get to my front door again…and I stand there. His vacuum turns on again. What the heck???!! Okay, so it shuts off again. Breathing, breathing, praying for courage…I open my door! I walk three steps and ring his bell. Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! Act normal…breathe!!

He opens his door and the heavens open up, angels sing, and its like “AWWWW” (singing voice). HE’S GORGEOUS!!! I already knew that, but its even better face to face. So I say, “Hi, I heard you knock. Sorry, I was on the phone with my mom.” LIAR!!! But he bought it...or at least he acts like it. Oh, did I mention he’s SHIRTLESS! Come on now, this can’t get any better. TRUST ME…IT DOESN’T. He invites me in and says, “Let me go put a shirt on.” I think, no that’s okay, I’m good…but whatever...he puts on a shirt. So as I walk into his apartment I notice something…there’s NO furniture, nothing at all! He says, “You caught me in the middle of packing…I’m moving tomorrow.” And in the most ridiculous, girly voice I say, “Oooh, Really?” So we hang out for a while and talk and laugh a lot and I finally realize there is no point to me being here since he’s leaving for Omaha, Nebraska in the morning so I say, “Well, I should probably go home so you can finish packing and cleaning.” And he says, “oh, by the way, I was going to ask you if you wanted to take care of my plant for me.” And he hands me this little baby plant. OH FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!!! All this for a stinkin’ plant! This is so like a bad chick flick. So I say, “Sure, but I’ll probably kill it.” Good move Anna.

So as I’m letting myself out and he starts to grab his vacuum again, he smiles at me and says, “I’m glad you left that note. It was really cool. It’s too bad I’m moving. It would have been nice to know I was living next to you.” Lalalala, we chitchat a little more and then as I’m walking out the door he says, “I’ll see you later.” I turn to him and smile and he laughs and says, “Or maybe not.” We both laugh and I walk out. What a night! I get all my nerves up for a stinkin’ plant!

So, I guess that’s it for me. No romance in the future. So much for that dream.

Tuesday, January 24, 2006

And then I found grace

A couple of years ago my world did a 180 in just one weekend. I went from having a job and a family to being unemployed and childless. You see, I had a crappy job. They didn't care that they pushed me past the point of being stressed out. They kept demanding more and more from me and when I couldn't keep up and play nice with everyone they fired me. And if that wasn't enough I made a very bad choice. Reacted in a way that I never should have and slapped my child on the face. I'm not proud of what I did but I won't make excuses for it either. Because what happened next changed my life forever. I found grace. Or maybe grace found me.

For a month I jumped through every hoop the State put me through. I took anger management classes in the City two hours away. We took family counseling. I was going through individual counseling. That was the longest, I mean THE LONGEST month in my whole life! I remember coming home with my husband one night after visiting Peanut and I decided right then and there that my daughter needed to come home, no matter what, even if it meant that I was no longer here. If it meant killing myself so she could come home then that was what I was going to do. I was alone. I didn't know if my husband would file for divorce because of the crap we were going through because of me. I didn't know anything. The world around me was shutting down and I didn't know what to do. Everywhere I turned I saw evil and I was scared.

I remember sitting in my dining room, on the floor, against the wall, in the dark, crying. I had called my mom but she couldn't give me the comfort that I needed, not that she didn't try. When friends and loved ones offered their comfort it was nice, but they couldn't do anything to change my situation.

But then came grace. You see, even though these people couldn't change my situation they knew someone that could help me through it. And even though at that moment I couldn't pray words much less a single thought I cried out to God, and He heard my cries. I was on that ledge, so to speak, looking at all the evil around me when grace wrapped around me like a giant bear hug from head to toe. I couldn't see God, but I could feel Him. And that made the difference.

Soon after that day a friend called me on her way to work to give me a word. She told me about how she was praying for me when she was reminded of the story of the three Hebrew boys; Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego. And she told me that God didn't rescue them from the fire. They had to go into the fire, but once there they were protected and everyone saw that the Lord was with them. And they came OUT of that fire and they didn't even smell like smoke!!!! She told me that I too had to go through the fire, but I had God on MY side and I was not going to smell like smoke!

We did make it through the court battles. Peanut, as you can tell, is back home with us and thriving. I no longer even come close to even thinking of slapping her even when she's being a total brat and I'm loosing patience. I'm a better parent. I'm a better wife. And best of all I'm closer to God. And this is the story of how I found grace... or grace found me.

Sunday, January 22, 2006

Peanut's Penguin Party

Over the weekend my Peanut informed the whole family that she wants a Penguin Party for her next birthday party. Now, her party isn't until March, but she wants to start planning it now, maybe take a dry run and invite a few people over to see how it goes before the actual event. You know, so we know how it goes over and all... ok she didn't really give me that reason, but I'm sure she was thinking it.

Do you know how much party stuff there is out there in those nice neat little packages that make birthday parties so easy? Um, that would be zero. Zip. Zilch. Nada. None.
She doesn't want Madagascar (which I'm sorta happy about because I didn't really like the movie-except for the penguins!)

Yep, so now I have to, as any good mother would do, find stuff for a penguin themed birthday party. So far I've found penguin lights on Ebay. A pinata on some other website (when it comes closer to the event I'll actually buy). I figure I could do a black table cloth and a white table cloth... black and white napkins. I don't think the cake will be any problem because any professional should be able to whip up a penguin, right? For fun we might make penguins puppets from paper sacks...

Help me here, give me some ideas.


Friday, January 20, 2006

RevGal Friday Five: Pleasures

Please tell us five pleasures in your life, be they small or be they guilty. Feel free to list them here in the comments, or to point us to your blog if you post there.

1. A large Davinci's Mocha... just because I don't usually spend $4 on a something to drink
2. Soaking in a hot bath reading a book while a little girl is begging for attention outside
3. A day spent on the couch in my pajamas watching tv. I have a DVR that records something like 10 different shows (including General Hopsital, all the CSIs, Numbers....) and ALL the times they come on so at any given time I might have 30 shows saved to watch.
4. A day off from work spent ALONE in my house (usually doing number 3)
5. Werther's Originals- Chewy... I can eat a whole bag in one sitting (I usually don't buy them)

Thursday, January 19, 2006


Ok, I'm just putting this out there though I know it's a very very long shot. I'm looking for my friend Kate Guimaraes (I hope I spelled that right). We graduated from Tahlequah High in 1997 and I think she's in Minnesota. I don't know if she's married. I don't know much more about her. I know the names of a couple of brothers and sister.... but I can't seem to find this family in any of the online searches I've done and I'm not to the point of paying money to do a background search (because I don't care about her background, I just want to know where she is now). So anyway, if you know Kate or if she somehow finds this post I hope you'll email me.

Thank you.

Wednesday, January 18, 2006

2006 Resolutions

Ok, I know we're almost three weeks into the New Year but I'm just now getting around to posting my resolutions. The life of the bookkeeper is quite busy this time of year.

New Year's Resolutions

1. I resolve to read 20 books this year, half of which will be "classics"
2. I resolve to write more
3. I resolve to find lost friends
4. I resolve to be happy

Ok, I think that's about all I can handle this year. What are your resolutions?

Tuesday, January 17, 2006

All Over Again

*updated on 1/17 to show you a picture of my grandma.*

Today, I was talking to Flashy and thought of my grandmother. Her birthday is at the end of this month. If she was alive today she'd be turning 94. However, the good Lord knew what was best and took her home in 1998, not long after my 19th birthday. I loved my grandma.

If I could step out of time for just a year and relive a year I think I would pick the year I was 18. Not out of regret (no, that would be the year I was 24). I would relive 18 just so I could spend more time with my grandma. To make more memories or at the very least hold on to the ones I have a little better. I graduated highschool that spring and after that I had to find a job. My first job was working for Cherokee Nation as a summer intern. I hung out with the other interns mostly, we were always together during the day and most of us had went to school together. The ones that didn't go to school with us in Tahlequah quickly became part of the group. If I could re-do that summer I would stop and see my grandma every day before going home, no matter what time I actually went home (some days it was 5 and others it was 9 depending on what we did after work). And since my grandmother was a worrier, I would have to call her as soon as I got home to let her know I got there safely.

That fall I started my first semester at Northeastern State University in Tahlequah. Somedays I would get lunch, Taco Bell or Burger King, and take it to my grandma's house. I had to be early otherwise she'd warm up a pot of beans. My grandma had lost her sense of taste for most foods, but sometimes she could actually taste the tacos and burgers. If I could re-do that fall I would make sure I took her lunch everyday and a fresh boquet of red carnations (her favorite) every week instead of wasting my money on a $300 phone bill.

Sometimes if I close my eyes and try real hard I can see her in my mind's eye. She's always in a red sleeveless shirt (very hot natured only wore sleeves when it got close to 0) and black slacks. And I can always see her smiling. So maybe I don't need to relive 18, but it would be nice to hug her one more time.

Friday, January 13, 2006

Her name is DOCTOR Peanut

Ok, I know this is my third post of the day but I've got lots and lots to say!!!
This has been career week at school for Peanut. The class was visited by a Mail Man, two Police Officers (the girl talked more then the boy I was told) and today they got "physicals" from their nurse/teacher. All three of the teachers were dressed in scrubs and looked quite comfortable. The kids made Dr kits today (you can see it on her bed by the baby) with a REAL band aid, cotton ball, and tongue depressor. There were a couple of other items in their kit but I'm not sure what they were. The kids also made flashlights to wear around their heads, "like real doctors".

On the way home she told me when she grows up and becomes a doctor she'll take care of me. EVEN if it's a Saturday! And she'll drive me to her hospital! Now that's what I call service.
Ha ha! Doc Pontious, you have some competition coming up! As soon as we got home Peanut got out the rest of her doctor supplies that she got as a "we're-sorry-we-had-to-put-you-through-that-as-such-a-young-age" present from me and dad when she had tubes put in her ears two or three years ago. Sometimes she's a doctor and sometimes she's a nurse. Just depends on the day.

I've been tagged.

Jennifer tagged me for this little list of Two Things.

2 names you go by:
1. Aunty Sissy
2. Sissy Anne

2 parts of your heritage:
1. Cherokee
2. White girl

2 things that scare you:
1. Being Alone
2. losing my parents

2 of your everyday essentials:
1. Coke
2. kisses (from my husband and daughter)

2 things you are wearing right now:
1. blue jeans
2. a purple shirt

2 things you want in a relationship (other than real love)
1. Honesty
2. Communication

2 truths:
1. God is
2. You cannot spin your right foot clockwise while drawing a six in the air with the same hand
(lol, you tried it!)

2 of your favorite hobbies:
1. Playing on the internet
2. Hanging out with friends

2 things you want really badly:
1. A life... oh wait, I have one, sorta... at least online I do...
2. A money tree

2 places you want to go on vacation:
1. Italy
2. A warm beach

2 things you want to do before you die:
1. Play with my great-grand children
2. Travel the world

2 ways that you are stereotypically a chick:
1. I cry
2. I like to talk on the phone

2 things you are thinking about now:
1. Is there anything sitting on my desk that can't wait until Monday?
2. I wonder if I have a fingernail file in my purse

2 stores you shop at:
1. Old Navy (just got a couple new shirts and camis!)
2. United- my grocery store where I try to buy everything at so I don't have to go to Walmart

2 people to tag:

Do you know what day it is?

*cheesy "scary" music playing in the back ground*
The moon is starting to look full....
The children are all acting out of control.....
Yep, you've got it......
Can't I just go back to bed and not get up again until Sunday?

Thursday, January 12, 2006

Welcome to Oklahoma.

Will Rogers once quipped, "If you don't like the weather in Oklahoma, wait a minute and it'll change."

A couple of days ago Peanut was playing in the back yard with her Eskimo named Snoogans. Today the snow is only a memory shared by these friends. Will Rogers was SO right. That day we received 2 inches of snow and every day since it's been in the 60's.

Snoogans hugging his Peanut.

Wednesday, January 11, 2006

Another story of Peanut's love life

I love it when 5 year olds are in love.

As you may recall back in December Poke's Fan proposed to Peanut. She turned him down flat, but they've remained amiable (though from time to time they fight like brother and sister). Today it seems that he has given up on Peanut ever changing her mind and has asked Hallie to marry him. She has agreed. They plan to get married in Jamaica and then attend Texas Tech. (I'm not making this up! This is what he told Peanut on the way to kindergarten today- thier bus driver retold the conversation to me). Peanut, not wanting him to think she'll die without his attention was quick to point out that two boys in her kindergarten class have crushes on her. One sits next to her.

I might have to have a conversation with the teacher.

I asked Peanut this afternoon if either of them or if both of them were her boyfriend. She said no. I think she's playing hard to get. I asked her if she liked anyone. Again, she said no but her best friend Curly Hair Girl has a boyfriend in her kindergarten class. I don't know yet if a boy will ever cause her to settle down. I'll keep you posted though.

P.S. I think Peanut is the only kid on the planet that jumps up and down excitedly when told we're having meat loaf for supper.

Tuesday, January 10, 2006


I woke up this morning. Can you call 2 am morning? Anyway, I'm awake. I could not go back to sleep so I got up and checked on Peanut. She was sleeping away tucked into her bed. I made sure her covers were on her and noticed outside her window that it seemed more bright then usual. Even without my glasses I could see there was standing snow on the fence. SNOW. I'm excited and I don't even like cold weather. I walked to the living room and looked out the little window in the door. I could see more snow coming down but I couldn't tell how much we had recieved. I walked to Nickel's play room to the back door to look at the snow on my car. At least half an inch, but again, I don't have my glasses on. I walked to the dining room where I looked at the back yard. I expected to see my Eskimo playing in the snow. I guess he was asleep. Smart dog. I walked to the kitchen where I again looked out the window. The snow looked so perfect. Untouched. Pure. That got me thinking, or maybe it was the Spirit who reminded me that Isaiah 1:18 said, "Come now, let us reason together," says the LORD. "Though your sins are like scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they are red as crimson, they shall be like wool." Our Lord died so that our scarlet sins could be washed WHITE AS SNOW! What an awesome reminder He sends us in this form of snow. Pure, life giving snow. If you want to read my prayer stop by the Cornerstone Universe.

Be well my friends. May you have snow in your life to remind you of the promise made to you!

Sunday, January 08, 2006

Your Turn

Ok, I'm opening up my blog today (and maybe a couple of days we'll see how it goes) to your questions.

Ask away!

If there's a question on your mind that you'd like me answer now's your chance. I may not give you this chance again.

Every question will recieve an answer an if it's a really really long answer then I'll make a post out of it.

So, here we go!

Saturday, January 07, 2006

The HouseKeeper

I fired the House Keeper today. She just wasn't keeping up like I want her to. The new one starts tomorrow. That is if my feet.... um... I mean.... HER feet feel better then they do right now. Yeah, that's it. SHE has really sore feet from being in dressy sandles for the last two days while working a wedding....

Here is the list of things I require my housekeeper to keep up with:

Sunday: Assist Princess Peanut in cleaning her room. Princess Peanut cannot remember day to day that clean clothes go in the dresser and dirty ones in the clothes hamper so each article of clothing will have to pass the smell, sight, and memory test to see where ALL the clothes on her floor go. Also toys find themselves outside the toy box on a regular basis, these must return to their home so that Princess Peanut can vacuum, her favorite chore.

Monday: The Bathroom. Clean the bathtub, toilet, sink. Sweep and mop. Mop the front entry way while the mop is out. Check supplies, write down low supplies on list in kitchen. Restock if necessary from supplies in hall closet.

Tuesday: Master Bedroom. Change sheets, fold and put away clean laundry. Put dirty laundry in laundry room. Pick up Nickel's dirty clothes because even though the hamper is in the bedroom next to the door where it's been for the last 7 years he can't seem to ever find it. Put jewlery away. Watch not so good TV and wish the DVR was in there for days like this.

Wednesday: Living Room. Princess Peanut can help out in this room because 9/10's of it is hers. She can also vacuum. This is handy because only 30 minutes is alloted for the Living Room, the rest of the evening is spent at church.

Thursday: Dining Room. I never actually seem to get into this room, well except to blog but I can't clean and blog at the same time. Oh, and neither can the House Keeper... Goals for this room are to actually find the dining room table once a week. Princess Peanut can again vacuum.

Friday: Kitchen. Though the dishes have been washed once or twice during the week all dishes must be clean before bedtime. Counter tops wiped down. Plants watered. Floor vacuumed... yes, I have crappy carpet in my kitchen but hopefully I'll get a wood floor put in someday!

Saturday: Laundry Room. Though laundry was done off and on throughout the week it must be finished and removed from this room today. Machines wiped down from lent and floor swept and mopped.

Why did I fire the last House Keeper? Well, she starts off the week great, but never can make it past the living room. Perhaps I should change it up for the next one? I'll let you know how she turns out. But she looks a lot like the last one... could they be related?

A Beginning and An End

Today was my fourth wedding as a wedding coordinator. This one was by far the best! Weddings don't make me cry, not even my own, but this one touched me. The family was awesome and willing to help out so much. The bride and the groom were so gracious and loving. I had a wonderful day and enjoyed every minute...except the last few of being in my high heeled shoes but not because of anything had said, done, or not done.

Just as I was fixing to leave my family called and requested I bring home supper. I was more then willing to oblige. I stopped at our favorite Mexican resturant and got our favorite foods and came home.

But before we could sit down to eat my husband's phone rang. Within moments we learned that our dear friend Tony had recently passed away. Tony is the only person on this planet that my husband willingly allowed to pray with him when we were going through the darkest time of our lives. Tony was great friend and will be missed.

Thursday, January 05, 2006

Quote of the Day

Courage is not the absence of fear but the knowledge that something is more important than fear.

-Princess Diaries

Drama Princess Strikes Again

For Christmas Nickel got two tickets to see the New Orleans Hornets, who are playing in Oklahoma City for now, play against the Miami Heat. This probably means nothing to you, as it didn't to me, but Shaq plays for the Miami Heat and Nickel likes to watch Shaq play. After opening this present from his uncle this stoic man was obviously excited and he asked me if he had to take me. Knowing that he would have more fun with his friend J, I said no. At that time I didn't realize it was a Wednesday game and wouldn't have wanted to drive to the City and home and go to work the next day all tired. But I digress.

Last night Nickel and J went to the games. Peanut, who usually stays home on Wednesdays with daddy hung out with me. We went out to eat with J's wife then went home to start our evening routine because the next day school started back.

Peanut was in the bathtub for about 45 minutes when I started hearing this sobbing coming from the bathroom. I went to investigate. What I found was a Peanut wrapped in a towel just crying her heart out. I asked what was wrong. "I---- MIIISSSS----DDDDDAAAAAADDDDD---DDDDDDY!" she sobbed. You'd think this child never spent a moment away from her daddy.

I hugged her and told her she could watch 5 minutes of the game while we dried her hair. She spent the next 20 minutes crying off and on about missing her daddy before finally settling into her bed with a promise from me that he'd come kiss her when he got home and that he'd wake her up in the morning to get ready for school.

My Peanut is such a Drama Princess, not quite the queen because I still hold that title, but it's kind of sweet how she misses us when we're not there. Of course she randomly starts crying for the dog we had when she was 1 1/2 and doesn't really remember.... oh drama.

Wednesday, January 04, 2006

In other news...

A Church for Starving Artist gets the "best post I read today" award. If you have a couple of extra minutes I encourage you to go check out what Jan has been imagining. I think it's what a lot of us imagine and are too afraid to say, or too tired to repeat ourselves one more time.

Tuesday, January 03, 2006


Last night as I was putting the Peanut to bed she picked Green Eggs and Ham as her bedtime story. This is one my personal favorites so I was happy to read it to her. But as I was reading I realized that a lot of these words are the site words she's working on in kindergarten. Hmm.. I thought, maybe she could read to me!

So, last night was Peanut's first attempt at reading. It was quite funny. She knows the story almost as well as I do so she tried to jump ahead without reading the words. And she didn't know all the words. She knows: I A AM CAN LIKE THE... so I had to help with a lot of the other words but she caught on to some of the other words quite quickly!

About page 35 she stopped and asked me if I could read the rest and she'd just say the words she knew but I decided that reading 35 pages for the first time probably was enough and just read the rest of the story in fast-forward like I usually do.

Peanut wasn't as impressed with her reading abilities as I was but I'm still very very proud of her!

Side note, tonight she picked a book that I she didn't know many words so I wouldn't make her read! LOL. Mama ain't raisin' no fool!

Sunday, January 01, 2006

The Sock Thief

Your honor and ladies and and gentlemen of the jury, my client, Ms Peanut, has been wrongly accused of leaving clean-folded socks in the living room and dining room. Evidence presented today will prove beyond a shadow of a doubt that my client could not have left the socks in the floor and should therefore be released from any punishment.


The defense can call their first witness.

Your honor, we call Mom to the stand.

Raise your right hand. Do you swear the tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth so help you God?

I do.

Mom, in your own word describe for us the scene that took place in your house just days ago.

Well, I was cleaning my house and I noticed two pair of clean socks lying in the floor of the dining room on the path we take from the living room to the kitchen. Thinking that perhaps she or I had dropped them while doing laundry I picked them up and took them to her room where I placed them back in her still opened dresser.

What happened the next day?

The next day I found two new pair of clean socks lying in the floor. One under my computer desk and the other next to the desk. I then asked Peanut to take them back to her room and she did.

Did you ask her if she had got them out of her dresser?

No. I just assumed she did.


Because they were her socks.

I see. And tell me, have you seen any socks in the floor since?

Yes, I found some socks just inside the living room at 12:25 am this morning.

Had the socks been there before?

No, the socks were not there when I went to bed at 11:00 pm.

I see, and where was my client when you found these socks?

She was at her grandparents house where she was staying the night.

Did you see anyone in the living room?

I saw the cat.

The cat. And did you pick up the socks?

Yes, I took them back to Peanut's room.

And what did you find?

I discovered the dresser drawer that holds her socks was open.

Could you, then assume that the cat had taken the socks.

Objection, calls for speculation.

I will allow it. Please, answer the question.

Yes, because Peanut was not home, my husband and myself were asleep and the cat was not, and because the cat was found with the socks I believe that the cat removed these socks and has been the one taking the socks out of Peanut's drawer at night to play with them. Or she could be trying to put them on, but why would a cat need to wear socks?

No more questions your honor.

Because of this new evidence I find that Ms Peanut is innocent. She should be given icecream for dessert after lunch as a sincere apology. Case dismissed.