Sunday, November 25, 2012

The Long Night

10:58 pm
My bed is crowded with an extra body as I prepare to find my rest. I smile and gather the little boy into my arms and carry him to his couch. He doesn't like to sleep on his bed. His sister is already asleep on the other couch. I'm not sure why I even keep beds in their rooms really. The boy coughs in his sleep. I fill a humidifier to help him breathe easier throughout the night. Finally, I can go to bed.

11:24 pm
The bed shakes as someone crawls into bed next to me. I smile and make room.

11: 42 pm
The Boy cries and crawls out of bed. He coughs as he finds his way to his couch. I get up and find his cough medicine. His dad had tried to give him some earlier but the boy wouldn't take it. I try anyway hoping that in the sleepy haze he'll forget about how much he hates taking medicine. He hasn't but still he took some. I fix him some juice to help get rid of the taste in his mouth. He settles back down. I go back to bed.

12:17 am
A mumbled cry wakes me from slumber. I begrudgingly leave the warmth and comfort of my bed to follow the cries. In the darkness of the living room I find Boy Who Doesn't Talk (aka Baby Butter) standing there holding his monkey close to his heart. He coughs. I can hear that he is wheezing slightly as well. I go to him as he lays down in front of the dark Christmas tree in the dining room. I plug in the tree to give us some light and hold him. I rock him in my arms. Usually he does not allow this sort of comfort. He coughs again. He isn't running a fever. For that I am thankful. He sits up though he makes no move to leave me. He is still wheezing slightly so I set him down.

12: 24 am
I set up his nebulizer.  He actually allows me to place the doggy mask by his face. I am frightened by the sense of helplessness. After a few minutes I go get his pillows off the couch and mine off my bed. I grab the big Spiderman quilt I made. He has abandoned his breathing treatment for the pillows. I show him he can have both. We lay there together as he takes in the fogged air. I feel helpless as I watch him watch me. He smiles slightly. We lay there together for a long time. I tell him to close his eyes. He says no. Boy Who Doesn't Talk does talk from time to time.

12: 49 am
I move to a nearby chair. It is hard for me to lay on the floor. I'm not as young as I use to be. But I can't go back to bed and leave him alone. Boy Who Doesn't Talk sits on his knees and talks in a language I cannot understand to the tree.  He is excited and bounces on his knees.

1:29 am
He still admires the Christmas tree from his place under it. Most of the ornaments he placed on it himself. I wonder what he is thinking. The wheezing has past for now, I am thankful. "What's that?" he asks when I join him again. "Snowman" I whisper. "What's that" he asks and points to another ornament. "Dragonfly." "What's that?" he asks again. "An angel. What's that?" I ask him this time. "Car. Vroom." "And that?" I ask. "Ball!"

1:44 am
I remind him it is night-night time. He shakes his head at me and pokes out his bottom lip. I wonder when I'll get sleep again. He drags the Spiderman quilt into the living room and lays back down under the Christmas tree. I retrieve the quilt "Huh-uh" he says shaking his head and palm no. He goes and gets the quilt Nana made him. He and his monkey look almost ready for sleep. Almost.

2:14 am
The Boy is wide awake. I yawn and yearn desperately for my bed. The boy pats my head in comfort. "Heart" he says as he holds up the first Christmas ornament I bought his dad and my's first Christmas, two red hearts with each of our names written on them. I smile at the memory.

2:41 am
He's starting to wheeze again. The last breathing treatment has kept us up over two hours now. I don't know what to do. He's rearranging the ornaments on the tree and seems very happy doing this. Occasionally he lays down with me but only lasts a few moments before he up and busy again.

Sometime around 3:30 am
Sweet sweet slumber. Thank you Jesus.

Wednesday, September 12, 2012

You need Jesus

Working the front desk at the library I am able to talk to a wide array of people of varying of degrees of education, income and religion. On any given day I will speak to Catholics, Mormons, and atheists.  Apparently there is something in my aura this week because three people have given me a "little something" from their church.

I thought I had a pretty good relationship with Jesus, but maybe they know something I don't.

Friday, August 10, 2012

Did That Just Happen

I spent my day off with Peanut today. Butter likes to stick to his schedule and would really rather not go shopping so he spent a few hours at daycare. Besides, the lucky girl leaves for her annual summer Tulsa trip tomorrow. Then on Thursday Butter and I will pick her up and head to Tahlequah to visit for a few day. Pretty sweet vacation.

Nickel has threaten to "clean" Peanut's room while she is gone. That word strikes fear in both her and myself because Nickel's definition of "clean" very different ours. His involves lots of garbage bags. I'm not opposed to getting rid of junk and trash but sometimes he goes a little overboard. So to help her out we bought some clear tubs for her to sort her important things.

In the car on our way home she told me that she was actually in the mood to clean her room and was a little excited to organize these tubs. I told her I would help her pick up her room.

"Let me work on it for thirty minutes by myself, first!" she exclaimed.

"Uh, sure," I replied.

Wait, did she just say she was going to clean her room by herself? Sweet! I wasn't even trying to use reverse psychology but it worked.

I am amazing!

Tuesday, August 07, 2012

Blowing Kisses

It's Tuesday. Generally I hate Tuesdays. But TheBoyWhoDoesNotTalk(much) blew me a kiss so everything is going to alright.

Monday, July 30, 2012

New Friends

The library director said in a recent staff meeting that she likes working the circulation desk with me because I know everyone. And to her it may just seem like that. We have a lot of regulars that come to the library on a daily, weekly, or monthly basis. Often I will comment on a book if I've read it or even just read about it and I'm frequently asked to recommend new books or authors for them to try. I have to scan their card to check them out and after so many scans and saying "Thank you [insert name here]" I remember their name.

First, I heard or read somewhere that if you know someone's name you have power over them. And since Nickel made me watch Spiderman movies, I know that with great power comes great responsibility so I don't abuse this power but if someone is not behaving as they should (a particular teenager comes to my mind) I can walk up to them, call them by name, and explain to them the behavior that is not acceptable and they are more likely to stop said bad behavior. It doesn't always work but in the case with that particular teenager it did. He was so impressed that I knew his name that he hasn't acted up since. Now when he comes into the library he says hello to me and encourages his friends to behave!

Second, knowing someone's name a way to form a relationship and friendship. Like Cheers only at a library. I don't know anyone named Norm though, sadly. And I do form friendships with patrons. I think it makes people feel good when they walk up to the desk to pick up a book they placed on hold and without them even saying anything I've pulled their book off the hold shelf and start up a conversation. I've got to know some patrons well enough that I've loaned out my personal books, text them about any and everything, share my reading logs from Goodreads, talk to them on Facebook, exchanged recipes, and played with their kids!

Speaking of kids, I'll tell you a little secret, my favorite patrons are the ones that are 0-6 years old. The babies I adore mostly because I don't have one that small to play with anymore and it'll be  a long time (hopefully 15-20 years) before i have grandkids. The toddlers are fun because they're just getting into books and stories.

But the 4-6 year olds are the best! These kids tell me WONDERFUL stories. One day a boy of 6 or 7 years checked out a few books and he said to me, 'are you Butter's mom?' (Ok, he used Butter's real name but this is a semi-private blog so just pretend with me here.) I of course said, 'Yes! I'm Butter's mom. How did you know?' It turns out he goes to the same daycare. Kids see everything. 

Another day another young man brought up his books to check out. I asked him what he was reading about that day and he told me animals. I told him I like animals too except for gnats and flies, but I like cats and dogs and I like giraffes because they have long necks and I think that's pretty cool. He told me all about how a giraffe licked him one time at the zoo. He was pretty proud of that.

One day two girls came in with their mother and were so excited because they had just found out that their mom was going to have a boy! They hadn't even had a chance to tell their grandparents yet. In fact I was the first one besides them to know that they were going to have a brother. That's quite an honor, even if I was just the first person they had spoken to after hearing such wonderful news. Now when they come in I ask them, 'When is that baby brother going to get here?' And they cheerfully tell me 'November!' and of course I act like I just can't wait to see him because neither can they.

Today a toe-headed boy came up to the desk with his grandfather. He told me about how he and his 7 cousins were going to spend the night at his grandparent's house next weekend. We decided that that was going to be a lot of fun. He was very polite. It made me a little sad that Butter doesn't talk to me like this boy did though.

I'm going to miss some of these kids when school starts and they're too busy to come to the library but hopefully they'll be back next summer. And I know there are kids that were too busy to come to the library over the summer that will be back when school starts. 'Tis a cycle, I suppose. But these kids and even the adults that I've gotten to know make my job so much fun!

Wednesday, June 27, 2012

My New Favorite Author

I have a new favorite author.
This changes on a regular basis so it's not really that impressive. I've been frantically collecting all her works lately which is probably why it's taken me over three weeks to update this blog. That's a lie, truth is I've been reading her since February picking up a book here and there, but I have been reading a lot lately and working full time and it's summer and my girl child was gone for three weeks so of course I had to spend more time with the boy child and the man when I wasn't soaking up the peace and quiet and that is why I haven't blogged.

Oops. Sorry.

Let me tell you a little bit about Susanna Kearsley, the author that is my new favorite. (I'll try not to be too wordy but I make no promises) She is simply amazing. That is my opinion. And my opinion is very important, as you know.

Susanna writes, "modern gothic novels that blend historical adventure and modern-day suspense with romance and a touch of something spooky." (from her amazon bio)

All things that I really enjoy in books rolled into one.

These books are not bodice rippers where the man and woman fall instantly in love with each other at sight and after overcoming a little internal and external conflict live happily ever after (even though I enjoy those books too).  In Susanna's books the characters are deeper than that and so is their love for each other.

Her first story I read was Winter Sea. I had seen it as a recommendation on Amazon and requested it through my local library's digital library. Winter Sea is about a woman named Carrie McClelland who is an author and her research has brought her to Slains Castle located in Scotland. There her book seems to write itself in her dreams and when she checks her facts she discovers that everything is spot on as though she has lived the moment she is trying to describe herself even though it happened more than two hundred years ago. The book is crafted so well that the both the modern and the historical parts of the story are woven together flawlessly.

After Winter Sea I picked up Rose Garden for $2.99 on my Kindle, I love when Amazon discounts books I really want to read! After her sister's death Eva Ward returns to a place she spent as a child. Staying with friends Eva busys herself helping her friend launch their new Tea Room, but somehow she finds herself slipping through time. In the past she meets Jack and Daniel Butler, well known and well respected smugglers.  Finally she is faced with a decision, stay there and continue to slip back and forth between time or leave.

The third book by Susanna Kearsley that I read was actually the second one she wrote but was rereleased in the US on April 1 this  year, was Mariana. Mariana is another story set in England that has time travel involved without being hokey and very plausible. Artist, Julia Becket has felt that Greywethers has belonged to her since she was five years old and twenty five years later impulsivly buys it. For a time she feels like she's loosing her mind when one moment a room is set up one way and in the next it is completely different, as though from another time. And there are strange people in her house talking to her and she knows exactly what to reply because at that moment she is no longer Julia Becket but Mariana. There is of course a love story but the twist at the end just might surprise you!

Other books that I have already read are The Shadowy Horses, Named of the Dragon, Season of Storms and The Spendour Falls. Each amazing in itself and worth the read. I would rank these six books in order from my favorite to least favorite but the truth is I'd have five favorites and two second favorites. And that list would probably change when I reread them, because I do plan to reread them. Several times I imagine.

Still in my TBR (to be read) pile are Every Secret Thing, Gemini Game and Undertow. The latter two have been out of print for some time and I'm having a hard time laying hands on them. I might have to use the interlibrary loan system through the library to read them until I can someday own them.

So in short, if you can call a nearly seven hundred word post short, read Susanna Kearsley books. The three books I discussed can be downloaded to an eReader from Amazon or Barnes and Noble if you are inclined to buy. If not check out your local library and see what's in their digital library or even on their shelf. I did as Ms Kearsley (and she actually replied) if her other books would become available in the US for eReaders and she said yes, eventually. If your library doesn't have her ask for Title Request form or an Interlibrary Loan form and get one on the way. She is amazing and I don't think you'll be disappointed in her.

Monday, June 04, 2012

Why You Don't Discuss Medical Issues with Car Guys

The following is an actual conversation my husband and I had just today on Yahoo IM. Please note that we've been married for almost 13 years and this is the man who suggested he could help the doctor cut baby Butter out of my stomach with a plastic spoon (follow the link to see Nickel with said plastic spoon).

Me: I think I should have my blood pressure checked.
Nickel: i have a guage int the garage
Me: a blood pressure gauge?
Nickel: fuel pressure..should be same
Nickel: think you gonna blow a gasket
Nickel: i can check your vaccuum also
Me: I'm wondering if maybe my meds aren't helping me as much. I'm really lightheaded when I stand up. I only lasted at work about an hour
Me: I feel better when I'm laying down though.
Me: I felt ok first thing this morning but as the morning progressed and I was on my feet I tanked and felt like crap again. 
Nickel: crazy
Nickel: yeah i dont know anything bout blood pressure, so dont know if that would do it or not
Nickel: i dont know ..doc still on vacation?
Me: i don't know, haven't called maybe I could just email him and see what he suggests.
Me: he'll probably tell me to get my bloodpressure checked though. he's like that.
Nickel: seems like high blood pressure wouldnt make ya dizzy
Nickel: if you were a car i would say you have fuel pressure regulator issues
Me: wouldn't that equate to blood pressure?
Nickel: maybe blew a power vale last time you backfired
Nickel: yeah it does
Nickel: unless you have a vacuum leak
Me: bleeding on the brain?
Nickel: take a deep breath and hold it...see if you have any leaks around nose,ears, eyes..that area
Nickel: Some people with uncomplicated hypertension, however, may experience symptoms such as headache, dizziness, shortness of breath, and blurred vision usually with blood pressure that is very high. The presence of symptoms can be a good thing in that they can prompt people to consult a doctor for treatment.
Nickel: googles sez its high
Me: No leaks
Me: thanks googler
Nickel: still thinks its regulator,,,pressure high/not enough volume...could be your pump
Me: well, we don't want my pump, ie my heart, to go out so i guess i'll call the office.
Nickel: see if they can put in larger return line.
Me: I don't think that's possible without bypass surgery and I'm not in the mood for that thank you.
Nickel: we could do an external frame mounted set up make you look all cyberpunk bionic
Me: that's sweet, but no thanks
Nickel: i gots tools..the more dan and i clean the more i find
Nickel: i could build you a coolcan too fill with ice and keep you much cooler also
Me: well...uh...when you find them all we'll talk
Nickel: k
Nickel: til then best talk to a medical professional, or you will end up with petroleum based products runnin through your veins
Me: thanks babe.

Nickel: could move you up to a higher octane
Nickel: sucks you feel bad
Me: You know, I think I'm going to post this conversation on my blog. It's very enlightening.
Nickel: it may be easier to find a borg and get assimilated, they tend to repair flaws as they do the assimilation
Me: and someday when I write a book i'll put it in there too.

New Friends

I saw one of those eCard greetings on Facebook this morning that made me laugh. It has some inappropriate language so I won't post it, but the top part said, "I wish my house wasn't is such a disaster all the time, but folks won't quit writing good books and making cheap wine." I could care less about the cheap wine, but the good books are hard for me to put down.

But I recently discovered months ago and happily ignored until now, that several of my links are to people who a.) aren't there anymore and site has been disabled b.)haven't posted anything in an eon and have no plans to either or c.)I don't remember why I linked to them in the first place.

So I plan to go through my little list over yonder and see what needs taken down.


You knew there was going to be a but, didn't you? I've got several links that really must be added to the links tab and that is by far the most important news of this update.

But for now check out my friends Christy and Katie who will soon be added!

Tuesday, May 22, 2012

School's Out for Summer!

Catchy title, huh? Kinda makes you want to sing a song. Now if only you could remember the rest of the words to that song. I'd google them but I really don't care.

Yeah, I just said that.

I'm a librarian and I'm not going to take the time to find the answer and you can't make me.

So mleh.

Speaking of librarians, this video was messaged to my from a Melodious friend. She asked when I started doing commercials. I could do this. Watch.

So this actress is probably 10 years younger and 10 or 15 a lot of pounds lighter, but still, she looks Just. Like. Me!

Anywho, that's wasn't my purpose of blogging today. This was suppose to be about school being out.

Peanut has completed the 6th grade. Her teachers even decided it would be a good idea for her to go on to 7th grade next year. Amazing. Seriously, amazing.

I remember 7th grade. I remember my mother praying a lot that year, well actually she prayed a lot for three years.  I'm pretty sure she was tempted to put arsonic in my dinner because really, who likes to be around 7th, 8th, or 9th graders? I look back at that time in my life and I shudder. Maybe we all went through that stage where our mother made us clothes that looked similar to sofa covers, black with huge pink flowers and the sailor collars. I shudder because I thought I looked so pretty. It's no wonder I didn't have many friends then. (side note: I did have some friends and I'm even still friends with people who knew me back then, they're awesome for not remembering the huge pink flowered outfit I wore like every other day) I didn't really make friends until 10th grade when I became almost normal again. Almost. I hear we all went through an awkward stage during Jr High but I don't remember anyone else being awkward. Maybe I just have selective memory.

Butter, also finished up a school year. He only went the last 9 weeks. Had I known there was a program for 3 year olds with speech delays I probably still would've been in denial and not attempted to get him in the program earlier. He's coming along. We can understand one in every thirty words now!  (maybe a hint of sarcasm) He really likes school and riding the school bus, but he's missed being able to take an afternoon nap. So I'm hoping that he'll deal with daycare knowing that he gets to take a nap all summer. Not the same, I know. I mean, if it were me I'd rather take a nap than get on a bus and go to school, but to each their own.

So we have no big plan for the summer. Peanut's going to spend some time in the beautiful side of the state with my parents and going to camp. I loved church camp growing up but you couldn't pay me to go now. I value my sleep too much. But other than that not much happening around here. Just work. And lots of heat.

And to celebrate the first night of summer vacation I think I'll go to bed early.

I'm such a grown up. Dang it.

Wednesday, May 16, 2012

Fresh Air

A breath of fresh air, a change of scenery were just what the doctor ordered. Well, perhaps the Tall Doctor didn't say those exact words to me last time I was in his office. But I'm sure they were implied. And that's exactly what I got this past weekend.

For Mother's Day we packed up the children, gassed up the car and headed east. There's just something about Tulsa and Eastern Oklahoma that sooths my soul. It give me comfort and a sense of peace fills me.

(Though having some funny sounds coming from my car that stressed my husband out didn't exactly help my blood pressure.)

The weather was absolutely perfect. It was warm but there was a nice cool breeze blowing from time to time throughout the whole afternoon.  My wonderful sister-in-law prepared a delicious afternoon meal and the 6 adults gathered around a table near the pool while the 5 children found places to sit among the lounge chairs and parental laps. I had a headache for most of the day but the company couldn't have been better. The conversations, that I mostly just listened to, were lively and entertaining. I do so love Nickel's mom and brother and their spouses. The kids all get along very well though the two three year olds can push each other's buttons as three year olds are wont to do.

I don't know what it is about water but as soon as the pool is open the children have this overwhelming urge to jump in. So they did, all 5 of them took two or three dips playing until their lips turned blue and their parents made them get out. Peanut was told she could only get in if she watched Butter and she did a really good job accepting her roll without complaint. We, of course, were just a few feet away keeping our own eyes on the children as they played and when the three year olds were in the pool an adult was always poolside.

But I just relaxed. Soaked up some sun and Vitamin D. It was hard saying goodbye that evening but  Monday morning would be upon us before we knew it so we headed back west. It was a short day trip, but it was exactly what I needed to recharge my batteries.

This coming Friday is my day off since I work on Saturday. Being the our last chance before school is out next week, Nickel has taken a vacation day. It'll almost be like having a 6 hour date! I'm so excited. We'll probably do really exciting stuff like go to the bank, go out to lunch and grab some stuff from the grocery store. But there are a few other things we're considering. We might go look at some used cars, as reliable transportation is a must with all the trips we make back and forth across the state. And there's even a slight chance we might watch a movie. But if those plans fall through we might just stay home and watch a movie and take a nap. We do love our naps. Silly children, the antinaptakers, sometimes thwart our weekend naps but if they're at school, they can't stop us! Bwahahaha!

Whatever we do it'll be nice just to spend some time alone without being interrupted, without choosing a restaurant based on if they have a kids menu, and without having to stop in the middle of a conversation to explain what certain words mean. Wow, doesn't that sound nice?

So, it Friday yet?

Saturday, May 12, 2012


Time has a way of passing without one really noticing. Or we notice but still it seems to take us off guard, or at least it does me. Tonight I was having a serious conversation with Peanut that as a mother I'd hoped to never have but knew it was necessary.

During our conversation we were talking about online privacy and I explained that on this blog she always has been and always will be known as Peanut. For the most part only friends and family read this blog but it is an open blog and according to my site meter people from all over the world have at least stumbled upon the blog.

Peanut later asked what exactly was a blog. She's known about mine for years but wanted to see it. So I pulled it up and showed her some of the funny things she has said over the years. Conversations that made me laugh and wanted to remember for all time. She was highly amused and impressed with herself. The pictures made her laugh and on more than one occasion she said "I was so little!".

Yes, she was. In many ways she still is but time is passing and with it each day she grows not just in stature but in maturity and wisdom. There will come a time in the next few years when her bones will set and I won't have to buy whole new wardrobes every year. Both happy and sad that day will be.

I'm glad that even though I didn't write much for a few years there I kept this blog. I had on more than one occasion thought about deleting it but always stopped myself. This way, I can keep track of time as it slips past me like a ninja. And Peanut and Butter can look at it in years to come and see what I had to say, what they had to say, and follow time's progression in our lives.

"Time present and time past
Are both perhaps present in time future,
And time future contained in time past."
1936 Poem, ‘Burnt Norton’, by T S Eliot (1888 – 1965)

Wednesday, May 09, 2012


Do you ever feel like the creativity is being sucked out of you by a giant vacuum?

Last week a well of creativity sprung forth into life. I was excited. I was happy to dream big, imagine the possibilities, to try new things. I wanted to write again. I wanted to draw, take photographs, be a part of nature.  That creativity spilled over into my work. I made little signs.

And I believe that was where I went wrong.

Some places, you see, frown on creativity. And though my creativity wasn't belittled or mocked it wasn't appreciated either. I can recognize patronizing smiles from a mile away. So I stopped. I put away my creativity and the well that had so freshly sprung was once again dried up.

Now I look at this white box and I've got nothing. Nothing to say. Nothing going on worth writing about.


I'm empty. I wish I could call in sick today and just head out of town by myself for the afternoon, but that isn't a possibilty so instead I'll try to take a trip in my mind. Where do you go to get away from the pressures of life? Where do you find your creativity?

Sunday, May 06, 2012

Overwhelming Generosity

Where do blog posts come from and why do they always hit when you're in the middle of doing something else, like washing the dishes or better yet, sleeping? At 2:45 am my muse woke me up with a great blog idea and creativity held me captive until I told the story from beginning to end. But just telling the story in my mind wasn't good enough so here I am at 3:18 am penning my post

What started my muse thinking was the fact that it was getting warm in the bedroom. Being only May 6th we don't run the air conditioner 24/7 yet. When I'm sound asleep I don't really notice it being warm. But obviously, my muse did. And she remembered life without air conditioning at all.

Last summer as the temperatures started to rise we called upon a friend who for the last few years has had to charge our central air conditioning unit. Each year he would comment that he didn't know how much longer it would last and each year we survived the summer without issue. It took him about a week to come over as he had been on vacation at the time of our call, but he did come.  But the charge didn't last longer than a day. I'm not even sure it lasted a day to be honest with you. He gave us an estimate for a couple different ways of approaching the situation and told us to let him know when we decided.

I was devistated. Best case senario, we were out four or five thousand dollars.

After Butter was born we used up all our reserves and racked up new debt with me staying home with him and later only making minimum wage. We didn't have anywhere near four or five thousand dollars to spend on the air conditioner we were having trouble just making our monthly mortgage payment.

So I took really cold showers, several times a day, and tried to stay positive and open to creative ideas from God. This was no easy feat as heat makes me very cranky.

Then on Sunday afternoon CurlyHaired Princess called. She and her husband were moving to another Airforce Base and wanted to stop by for a moment. We had already said our goodbyes but I thought this was just another one. But when I answered the door there she stood with her husband and a window unit. I don't remember if I cried then or after they had gone but I do remember being overwhelmed by their generosity. Nickel installed the unit in our bedroom window and for the first night in weeks I slept soundly and comfortably. Peanut slept on our floor and Butter slept in bed with us (well, at least until he decided it was too crowded and moved to his couch in the livingroom).

My mother told me she and my dad wanted to do the same for us because she knew the one unit wouldn't be enough so off we went to buy another window unit. This picture is from that purchase. Doesn't poor Peanut look hot?! Heat makes her cranky too.  We found one a little bigger than the one CurlyHaired Princess gave us and installed it in the dining room. So for the summer we survived with two window units. They are fancy enough to come with remote controls and timers. The timers are wonderful! I could turn them off and tell them to come back on in so many hours, like maybe just an hour or so before we get home from work. Or I could time them to go off in so many hours, like the middle of the night. The kitchen didn't have any air, but to be honest, even with the central air the kitchen was always hot. And I just don't spend a lot of time in there in the summer, making meals as quick and easy as possible. The children didn't have AC in their bedrooms either, but it's not like they sleep in their rooms most of the time anyway. To this day, I often find them both asleep on the couches in the living room year round. As long as they sleep I don't care too much if it's in their beds or on the couches.

A year later we're still using the window units. Nickel just got the one in the bedroom back in the window last weekend. Bless that man!  Our electric bills last year were no different than with the central air so we've opted to use the window units for at least another year. We will eventually fix the central air and will hopefully be able to bless someone else with the window units. But until then, whenever I'm hot and turn on the AC or am cold and turn it off I will be grateful for the generosity of my friend, her husband, and my parents, who all agree I'm much easier to get along with when I'm not hot!

Thursday, May 03, 2012

(Almost) A College Graduate

I started college the fall semester of 1997. Fresh from high school I hit the ground running. My first act of business was taking a CLEP test to advance out of 10 hours of Spanish. That was fun. For three semesters I took a full load of classes and had 50 credit hours under my belt. 

Then I got bored. Truthfully, I just met Nickel and chose to spend my time with him instead of studying. So I sat out a semester (or three). I moved to the next town, got a full time job and fell madly in love. In the summer of 1999 I married that man and we moved halfway across the state. Being newlyweds I needed to work full time to help pay the bills. Peanut was born in 2000 and still I worked. But in the spring of 2001 I decided it was time to head back to school. I transferred all my credits to the local college and for three semesters I took classes that I needed, and some I didn't really need. I only took 3-6 hours each semester so that I could continue to work full time and take care of my family.  At the end of the fall semester of 2002 I lacked one Biology class to graduate. 

Five years later I finally took that class as well as a Creative Writing class.

There, I was done. All I lacked was the degree audit and the diploma. But funny thing happened. Well, not really. Maybe a better term would be a Lazy Thing happened. That semester we got pregnant with Baby Butter. By the spring I was waddling around, working part time and napping as much as possible. Then he was born and I became a creature of habit in my stay-at-home mom routine. Friends often encouraged me to just go do the final step and get my degree but that takes time. That takes gas to drive across town (this isn't a big town). And the truth of the matter is, it just wasn't that important to me. A degree, even a simple Associates Degree, didn't come into play with any job I had ever applied for. But it was always there in the back of my mind. Something left undone.

So today I dropped the kids off at school and empowered with a Carmel Machiatto I drove straight to Northern Oklahoma College, walked into the office and made my requests. After a little bit of paperwork I was sent to see my advisor. As luck would have it, he was in his office and was willing to take the time to do my Graduation Check. I only needed 64 hours to graduate and I have 79, well only 76 NOC would accept because I took a 3000 level Public Speaking course my freshman year, still I had enough hours to graduate. I just needed the right combination of hours.

My advisor jotted everything down. The only possible holdup will be the 2 hours of Physical Education. I never took bowling, square dancing or any sport. Years ago when I spoke with my advisor he said I was exempt and I of course never questioned that statement. However, I did take a 3 hour Personal Health class that he thinks should count. At first he had written down "waive" but decided to count this class instead.

I'm going to be honest, if the only thing keeping me from graduating is a 2 hour Square Dancing class I probably will not finish. I have no desire to take Square Dancing at this point in my live. I am 33 years old. I know the importance of physical activity in my life.

So now I wait. Two more people have to sign off on my degree check and once they do I will be issued a diploma. An Associates Degree in General Studies. A two-year degree that has taken me 15 years to accomplish. Better than some people I suppose. 

I'm a little nervous, but I'll keep you posted.

Wednesday, May 02, 2012


Whoa! After blogging for 7 years Blogger has decided to update things. I'm a little freaked out at the moment.

But maybe that's just the coffee talking.

Probably the coffee talking.

So I've been looking for a picture on my blog today. A few years ago when I got a new computer I transferred all my pictures to my new computer. Only, somehow I missed some. And now they are lost. Forever. One particular picture was taken sometime between 2005-2007 was of me in my office at the church I use to work at. In this picture I am drinking a cup of coffee. Well, I want that picture. Why? Just because I want it, that's why!

So I've been obsessively combing through my blog trying to find the picture. No luck. But I did find something greater. No, no pictures, but I found a piece of myself. A piece I had forgotten I even had. Seems that life has gotten in the way again and I lost track of something. Sometime valuable to me.

So here I sit, at my computer less than an hour from when I need to be at work and I haven't even showered for the day. TMI, I suppose. But I'm here at the computer typing away because I miss writing. I miss blogging. For years I used this blog to tell my stories of Peanut and Nickel and the things going on in our lives. I had crazy caption contests and posted funny pictures. I posted links to fun quizzes and random interesting facts. All pieces of me.

But then I had a baby, Baby Butter, I love him so much. And with a baby I got busy. But not really. I stayed at home with him for the first few months and then later I worked nights and weekends. I could have at any point in those days paused for 10 or 15 minutes to type out a little something. I guess what held me back was the fear of turning into a "OH MY BABY DID THIS TODAY" blog. Something I really didn't want. So instead I just didn't blog. Much. Not really, a random post here and there declaring that I would indeed get back into blogging again. But it never really stuck.

Today I read stories of the funny things Peanut said and did and I asked myself why I didn't write things like this for Butter. He's funny too. Granted, Peanut was 5 when I started this blog, so why can't I pick it back up now that Butter is almost 4? Another thing holding me back is my desire to catch up. But really lengthy blogs aren't so fun to read and really, no one cares so much. I might post some old pictures I threw up on Facebook just for grins and giggles.

So here goes, initiate blog version 9.78.

Wednesday, March 28, 2012

New Blog

I'm writing about my birthday in retrospect. I've had time to let the events of that settle in my mind and I'm ready now to talk more about it. Each act of kindness will have it's own post. Feel free to comment or ask questions.

Sunday, February 12, 2012

A Birthday to Remember

Wow, what a day. I've had almost 24 hours to recover and honestly, I'm still a little tired. I'm not sure where to begin, so I guess I'll start at the end, that's always a good place. At around 7 pm I stood just outside the church sanctuary with a platter of mini-cupcakes and tried to guess how many people were affected by my acts of kindness and I could not come up with an answer. And that, to me was a good number.

Please be prepared for a rather lengthy post as I recap the 33 Acts of Kindness.

At  7 am Eric, Lyndsay, Peanut and I arrived at a local coffee shop. I unloaded a few things from my trunk as Eric carried in a case of water from his. Inside I dropped off half a dozen pumpkin chai muffins, some apples, an orange and three bananas for the Enid Runner's Club. They were excited, though I do question their sanity as it was 16 degrees and they were out running. Next I gave a similar gift to the two hard working baristas and bought a $25 gift card and asked them to use it until it ran out. They gave me my coffee for free since it was my birthday. Peanut dropped off our 3 pairs of shoes plus a pair that YogaTeacherLibrarian had given to me to drop off for her, in the Soles 4 Souls donation box. With the first four acts of kindness down we sat and enjoyed a cup of coffee, a visit from a friend that came to drop off shoes too, and prepared ourselves for the bitter cold day ahead.

Our second stop was at one of the four fire stations Enid has where we gave them some donuts. I picked the one closest to my house because if I'm ever in trouble they will be the ones to come rescue me. The fire station has three firefighters at all times. They have 10 twelve hour shifts a month we were told. The first guy we met gave us a quick tour of the fire station. If you haven't ever done that I recommend you do so. It was a fun experience.

The third trip was one of our collective favorites. Just down the street from the fire station is a Laundromat. I have never used it but that doesn't mean that at some point in my life I won't need to. Nickel had give me $26 worth of quarters earlier that week so I armed my mini army with $2 of quarters each and we went inside to hand them out. The first lady I spoke to didn't really want to take my quarters at first but I explained that for my birthday I was giving instead of getting and it would really make my day if she would take my little gift. She did and so did the other 7 people in the Laundromat. Every single person in that place had a big smile on their face as we left and we felt great about it!

Next we donated clothes and moved on to the post office. Inside I took my box that was full to the brim of books, snacks, a magazine and a card for a US Soldier. I have no idea who will get my box, when they will get my box, or if they'll even like anything in my box (but I did put two kinds of girl scout cookies in there so maybe whoever it will like at least one of those), but I hope they do. I also sent my nieces and nephews some Valentines and candy that I'm sure they need. And then I mailed a few cards to some really cool kids that I know. I want them to know just how awesome I think they are. I don't think kids in general hear that enough.

By 9:30 am we had the first 10 acts of kindness down, but the rest of the day wouldn't pass as quickly. We set off from the Post Office and met up with RebornGirl at the nursing home her uncle currently lives in. We took him some cookies made with Splenda and told him to share with his friends. If there are any left that is. I also gave the nursing home a large print copy of The Help by Kathryn Stockett. It is an amazing book that I'm sure any of the residents that like to read would enjoy reading. RebornGirl also went with us to Leonardo's Discovery Warehouse where she donated some costumes her daughter had outgrown and I made a small cash donation.

Our next resting stop was Public Library. We gave the wonderful librarians hard at work a plateful of cookies that Lyndsay had made. Then gave a homeless man that comes to the library frequently a game of UNO. He likes to play cards, is good with math, and is small enough for him to carry around in his bag. He was really excited. I wish we would've had time to play a game with him but he was busy using his computer time. The final act of kindness there was simply taping 5 quarters to the vending machine so that someone got a free soda!

Here's where the day turned complicated. The next two locations I had planned out were closed on the weekends. Or at least their offices were. One was the YWCA and the other a boys home. So we took some cookies to the Enid Police Department and the cook staff at one of the local hospitals. At the hospital we asked our cookie recipient if she knew of anyone that needed flowers. After a moment's thought she directed us to the 5th floor south's nursing station. There we met a Nurses' Aide that had recently lost her brother. We gave her a small bouquet of flowers. She seemed pleased but she still had sad eyes. Maybe she's sick of flowers. I don't know.

We ate lunch at Chilis and afterward we gave the waiter a big tip and I bought a $20 gift card. As we were leaving I handed the gift card to woman who had just sat down wit her two kids. She was flabbergasted that a total stranger would just hand her a gift card to use for lunch. That was another one of my favorite gifts of the day.

We took about 50 Valentines and a bag of Smarties to the skating rink where one of my friends work. She agreed to put the Valentines and candy in the shoes of the kids so that they picked them up as they were leaving. I hope some of those kids smiled.

You know how crazy Walmart is on a Saturday? Well we went there anyway. I wanted to take one or two shopping carts back to the store because they were everywhere all over the lot. Peanut and Lyndsay got a little carried away and were trying to push about 12 back to the store. They got as far as the front door when two Walmart associates stopped them and said they'd get in trouble if the girls pushed them in. I think what they meant was they'd get in trouble by being shown up by two girls (one of which is 11 years old). Then, since the Homeless Ministries is closed on the weekends I bought some oral hygiene care products that I will drop off sometime during the week. And since Walmart is crazy I let another customer go ahead of me in line. The guy checking us out that I was insane and more so once I told him I was doing 33 nice things today. Oh well, can't please everyone.

After all that we were thirsty again so we stopped at a Sonic. In Enid, the Sonics have drive thrus as well as the pull up and park spots. We went through the drive through and while paying for our drinks I also paid for the car behind me. It was happy hour and they had only ordered two drinks, it was a little over two bucks, but they saved two bucks! Then we took the hard workers at EMS our last batch of cookies.

After that we took a little break. Eric had left us after lunch to go practice with the bands he was playing with this weekend and I dropped Lyndsay back off at her mom's house so she could play with her nephews. Peanut and I went home and I managed to take about a 33 minute nap.

At 5:30 Peanut and I met back up with Lyndsay (Eric was there too but he was busy getting ready to play in the worship band). The three of us greeted the attendees and gave them their weekly bulletin. Peanut passed out carnations to the women and I handed the kids Valentines. I gave both Lyndsay and Eric thank you cards with little gifts inside and I also gave the Nursery worker who takes care of Baby  Butter when he doesn't sleep through church and the Children's pastor and his wife a little card and gift as well.

My final act of kindness, as you know from the start of the blog, was handing out mini-cupcakes after church. Lyndsay and I both took a door and so did LibrarianFriend (she made the cupcakes AND took off the little papers before hand). As people exited I told them it was my birthday and asked if they wanted a little bit of birthday cake. We gave the kids cupcakes too of course as their parents went and fetched them.

The day was long but it was worth it. It was, by far the most memerable birthday of my life and out did last year's crappy birthday by a long shot! Will I ever do this again? Probably not just like this. I do think everyone should do something like this at least once in their life because it is a truly amazing experience and I will gladly help anyone that wants to tackle something like this themselves. But I probably will make giving a part of my birthday ritual. We'll see what next year brings.

Thursday, February 09, 2012

The Itinerary

I've had a few friends ask me about my itinerary for the Saturday's 33 Acts of Kindness. Here's where we're going to be starting at 7am and ending around 7pm:

Fire Station on North Grand
Suds Yer Duds on North Grand
Hope Outreach
Post Office
Highland Park Manor
Sequoyah Enterprise
Lunch--unknown location at this time
Enid First Assembly

Several of these are just going to be quick 10 minute or less drop offs. Others will be more time consuming. And most have more than one act of kindness associated with it. Further details will be provided the day of the event.

Friday, February 03, 2012

Getting Things Ready

With my birthday just a week away I'm trying to get a good start on the things I know I can have done before the busy day. Today I spent part of the day getting my valentines ready to go in the mail. Which reminds me, I need to get one address from my mom. Note to self....

I wrote out some cards to a couple of kids I know telling them that I think they're pretty awesome and to keep up the good work. I still have lots to do though. One of places we're going is the skating rink and I need about a hundred valentines ready to go into the shoes of these unknown to me children. It's a little thing, but a valentine and a piece of candy when they pick up their shoes might bring a smile to their faces. Candy usually works that way for me at least.

There are still plenty of things I need to do between now and then though. I need to clean out the closets and gather outgrown shoes and clothes for Soles for Souls and Hope Outreach.  And then there's the baking, but I'm saving that for the 10th so that everything will be good and fresh. And finally there are some phone calls to make. I'm exhausted already thinking about it, but it's going to be so worth it!

Tuesday, January 31, 2012

Almost Seven Years, But We're Not Counting

I've had several conversations lately about this blog. People always seem amazed when I tell them I've had it for nearly 7 years. In some ways it doesn't feel that long but in others it defiantly does.I've met some pretty amazing people, strengthened acquaintances and formed lasting friendships thanks to this blog.

I've introduced you to my family through pictures and stories and I don't see an end to this blog for some time even though my posts are sporadic at best these days.

Here's the first picture of Peanut I ever posted here in August 2005 with her then new dog.

My gosh is she just a little thing. Snoogans looks the same though even though the leash has faded into an ugly, dingy, ratty blue.

Here is Peanut in a recent photo. I mentioned in my last blog that she had recently attended her first winter formal. She's in middle school and they think they need to dance with boys in middle school. Yuk! Bleck! Ew!!! They have cooties. But she doesn't seem to care as much as she did once upon a time.

All grown up, my girl. Isn't she beautiful?! She's not finished amazing me yet. And her brother, well, he's just getting started on his adventure. I hope you'll continue to watch my family grow and mature over the years.

Leave me a comment. Let me know I'm not here by myself.

Monday, January 30, 2012

Copy Cat? Nah

My friend Danielle asked me tonight if I really made all those cookies on my blog.

[insert my confused look on my face]

I pulled up my blog on the computer.

[insert a confused look on her face]

She whipped out her phone and brought up my blog. Only it wasn't my blog. The name was ever so slightly different. is an adorable website (started 3 years after this blog I will only note is a hushed whisper) where this lovely, I'm sure, lady named Terri makes some wonderful looking cookies. Her blog is better designed and I will admit that I'm a little jealous.

But I also don't update this blog like I did once upon a time when Peanut (who just attended her first winter formal) said such clever things. As Butter grows up he'll be saying and doing more fun things that will require a blog post I hope and then I can blog like the wind again.

But anyway, go check out Terri and her beautiful cookies. Tell her hello from the other fresh cut flowers. :)

Sunday, January 29, 2012

12 days and counting

In 12 days....well really, in 300 hours....or in 18015 minutes I will begin celebrating my birthday.  My birthday has always been my favorite holiday of the year. It is closely followed by my very least favorite holiday, and that's Valentine's Day. But if you want to read about my hatred of V-Day you'll have to read about it here because that's not what this post is about.

No, this about about my birthday. The happiest day of the year. Well, at least is for me. But this year I want to share the happiness with my friends. With total strangers. With you.

How? Well, if you've been within talking distance or on this blog you've probably heard me talking about my birthday wish. That's to do 33 Acts of Kindness for my 33rd birthday. I don't mind people knowing how old I am, mostly because they usually don't believe I'm that old. Thank you mother for giving me life and great skin!!

So today I had lunch again with my friend Eric. We were joined today my our mutual friend Lyndsay who kept me entertained with her phone saying "Expecto patronum" every time she got a text message (it's a Harry Potter thing if you don't know already).  Our details are all set with the day broken down into two hour blocks of time and we're ready to go. More or less. The easy part is done. The work has yet to begin.

On February 10th I will be making one batch of muffins and three batches of cookies. There is some shopping to be done as we will be mailing out a care package to one of our brave soldiers overseas and valentines to some pretty neat kids. I need to gather up shoes we've outgrown or just don't wear for Soles for Souls, and clothes for Hope Outreach. And I also need to prepare about 100 valentines to be given out to random kids at the skating rink.

But we can do this.

And wouldn't it be crazy if we did MORE than 33 acts of kindness in one day? Is it possible? What would happen if you spent an entire day doing one act of kindness after another?

The possibilities are unimaginable.

Sunday, January 15, 2012

T Minus 26 Days and counting

When you last heard from me on this blog I was telling you about a crazy idea for my birthday. Well guess what, my birthday is closer and I'm still on board for this crazy idea.

What crazy idea? Well, in case you have slept since my last post, or are just too lazy to scroll down a tiny bit to read it I'll recap. Ready?

33 Acts of Kindness
1 Day

There, now you're up to date.

Today I had a late lunch with my truly amazing and talented friend Eric (FollowEricdotCom). Eric has masterfully coordinated a few blog-a-thons (which you can read about on his blog) in the recent past and I decided if my plan was to work I needed someone even better than me at planning this day out.

I went in to our meeting with a list of a baker's dozen of intentional acts of kindness I'd like to accomplish. Only one did we really cross off. Giving blood would be great but I can't actually give blood, I had just written it down after seeing it listed on a website.

Throughout our meal we brainstormed and I was in awe of how much we came up with. Our list doubled in just an hour with the possibility of more after some phone calls are made.

Giving to local charities is high on list as is giving to people who serve our community. I see a lot of baking in my future.

Do you want to help?

Several of my friends have expressed the desire to help out with a couple of the Intentional Ats of Kindness but don't want to commit to the whole day. That is fine! In our next meeting Eric and I (and anyone else that wants to join in on the fun) are going to map out our plan of attack. Because of the time limits I have placed on myself (roughly 12 hours) we want to minimize travel time and will zone these acts of kindness the best we can. Anyone interested in helping can comment here on the blog, comment or message me on facebook, or call/text me if you have my number.

Want to help but can't be in Enid or just have other plans on February 11th? Well, we're taking donations. Gently used clothes, shoes, and canned goods will all be donated to various charities throughout the day. You can give me any of those items up until we drop off.

Like to bake? Well, I have a list of baked goodies I'd like to pass out from sugarfree (or rather Splenda-made) cookies, to brownies and cupcakes.

I'm really looking forward to my birthday and I hope that follow along and join in with your own intentional acts of kindness!